Ever since I can remember, I’ve wanted to be a small business owner. When I was very young, my cousin and I used to play for hours and hours as if we were running our own business. We’d hire and fire employees, take lunch breaks, organize papers…you know, the things you think you’d do in business when you’re young…and it was always so much fun. We were so into it that we each got attaché cases for our Christmas gifts so that we could carry our business supplies and tons of play money in…it was easy to make money in business back then!
My grandmother would let me go crazy ordering office and stationery supplies from office supply catalogues. I had staplers, staple removers, markers, pens, pencils, columnar pads, file folders, and so many stamps: “Confidential”, “Approved”, “For Your Review”. And, no matter which grandparents’ house we were at, there was always a desk that we could use for our business purposes (who said working remotely is a recent idea?!).
Then you grow up. You go to school. You go to college (if that’s for you and you're lucky enough to be able to). You get a job. And you work. For someone else. And, along the way, you lose track of that dream. You get lost in the I-Could-Nevers and the I-Can’t-Do-Its. You dare to dream on your weekends, but you still wake up at 8am on Monday to get ready for your job working for someone else. And, that becomes ok—after all, childhood passions and dreams must give way to making money and “adulting”. So you work. And you create a comfortable life that, for the most part, contents you. Working for someone else can be very rewarding. It can give you time to take vacations and ensure you have healthcare (two things that are very difficult when you have your own business…take it from someone who rarely vacations and pays out of pocket for every doctor visit). Plus, not everyone dreams of taking on their own business. But, some of us do, and it's hard to remain happy in a job when your heart attempts to flutter in other directions from time to time.
And, that’s what I did for quite awhile; I gave up my “childish” ideas and I got a job…then another…then another. I truly loved many of them, and, in many ways, I found pieces myself through them. But, you’re still always looking for things that you would do differently if it were your business (bosses rarely like this, by the way).
Then one day, if you’re lucky like us, you’re given an opportunity. One that’s ridiculously scary, but deep down, you feel something. It’s like when you’re trying to re-light a campfire with a single, small burning ember. You blow and blow and you tend to it, making sure not to smother it before it can catch again. That’s what it’s like. You’re seriously afraid that it’s going to go out if you mess with it too much…it could create darkness in your world if you’re not careful. (It’s scary thinking that dreams could turn on you if you’re not careful.) But, if you take your time, and you give it your attention, it could reignite the joy and the wonder and the spirit in your world again.
We were lucky to get the original offer of rental space when we were in the right mindset to take on something like Allegory Gallery. It’s not always been a breezy, easy ride—not by a long shot. When you play in your youth, you don’t have to worry about real world things. You don’t have taxes. You don’t have accounting. You don’t have schedules. You don’t have mortgages. You don’t have rent. You don’t even have groceries to buy. But, in the “real world” we do. And, if you make the jump like we did to give up everything else and make your business your only work, you have a lot on the line—and that can take its toll.
I’ll be honest. It paralyzes me with anxiety and fear sometimes. Some days are so close to the negatives on bank accounts that I’m sick to my stomach and don’t want to get out of bed. While this probably seems totally contrary to what I should do (get up and work harder), anyone who has anxiety probably understands what it’s like and what I mean. If you don’t, I’m glad that you don’t deal with these things. But sometimes wondering if you’ll have the money to make your mortgage or rent or even buy groceries is enough to drive you momentarily insane. You get lost in the ledgers and the spreadsheets and the moving money around and your heart feels like it’s just going to burst out of your chest as you hit “pay minimum payment” on your credit card bill.
Yes, it’s scary at times. But, then I look at what I get to do. I get to meet new creative people nearly every day. I get to watch peoples’ hearts open as they learn something about themselves—that they can create. We’ve built a tribe of “our kind of people”. Who doesn’t want that in their life, after all? I’m surrounded by treasures of the earth and the artist all day long. I have friends across the country and across the world that I know have our backs. And, now, my ideas are mine to implement—for better or worse. I don’t need to run my ideas by a manager and hope they don’t take the credit. I get to play and try and experiment. And none of this would be possible if we hadn’t taken that first plunge.
And, if that was it, that would still be enough to deal with the anxiety that comes along with it all. But that’s not all. We’ve also watched so many people who started making jewelry with us go on to build their own businesses. Sometimes it’s just selling a few pieces here and there as they feel they want to. But, other times, it’s full-fledged businesses with tax IDs and fictitious names. We’ve helped these people fill out forms, get credit card processing, and make websites. We’ve had the privilege of helping people of all ages start their own businesses. And that’s really the amazing part. Not only have we built a creative community, but we’ve build our own small business community.
I guess as Small Business Saturday is approaching, I’ve had a lot on my mind about what it is to own your own business. People often ask what it’s like, and it’s always hard to put into a few sentences (obviously…look at this post already!). It all comes down to our supporters though. Without all the wonderful people who shop with us and visit us and take classes with us, we couldn’t be here. We couldn’t pay our mortgage, and we couldn’t develop new and interesting ideas, groups, and programs to allow people to explore their creativity. And, over the years, if we hadn’t been around doing what we’re doing, many other people may not have started their own businesses or realized their talents. You never know what’s going to happen when you start your own business. You never know how many lives you’re going to touch. And, you certainly don’t know where the path will lead.
Today, I’m doing what I dreamed of doing when I was that young boy with the support of a lovely family and community. And, I’m helping others achieve that dream, too. I’d say that’s a pretty great path to be on.
My grandmother would let me go crazy ordering office and stationery supplies from office supply catalogues. I had staplers, staple removers, markers, pens, pencils, columnar pads, file folders, and so many stamps: “Confidential”, “Approved”, “For Your Review”. And, no matter which grandparents’ house we were at, there was always a desk that we could use for our business purposes (who said working remotely is a recent idea?!).
Then you grow up. You go to school. You go to college (if that’s for you and you're lucky enough to be able to). You get a job. And you work. For someone else. And, along the way, you lose track of that dream. You get lost in the I-Could-Nevers and the I-Can’t-Do-Its. You dare to dream on your weekends, but you still wake up at 8am on Monday to get ready for your job working for someone else. And, that becomes ok—after all, childhood passions and dreams must give way to making money and “adulting”. So you work. And you create a comfortable life that, for the most part, contents you. Working for someone else can be very rewarding. It can give you time to take vacations and ensure you have healthcare (two things that are very difficult when you have your own business…take it from someone who rarely vacations and pays out of pocket for every doctor visit). Plus, not everyone dreams of taking on their own business. But, some of us do, and it's hard to remain happy in a job when your heart attempts to flutter in other directions from time to time.
And, that’s what I did for quite awhile; I gave up my “childish” ideas and I got a job…then another…then another. I truly loved many of them, and, in many ways, I found pieces myself through them. But, you’re still always looking for things that you would do differently if it were your business (bosses rarely like this, by the way).
Then one day, if you’re lucky like us, you’re given an opportunity. One that’s ridiculously scary, but deep down, you feel something. It’s like when you’re trying to re-light a campfire with a single, small burning ember. You blow and blow and you tend to it, making sure not to smother it before it can catch again. That’s what it’s like. You’re seriously afraid that it’s going to go out if you mess with it too much…it could create darkness in your world if you’re not careful. (It’s scary thinking that dreams could turn on you if you’re not careful.) But, if you take your time, and you give it your attention, it could reignite the joy and the wonder and the spirit in your world again.
We were lucky to get the original offer of rental space when we were in the right mindset to take on something like Allegory Gallery. It’s not always been a breezy, easy ride—not by a long shot. When you play in your youth, you don’t have to worry about real world things. You don’t have taxes. You don’t have accounting. You don’t have schedules. You don’t have mortgages. You don’t have rent. You don’t even have groceries to buy. But, in the “real world” we do. And, if you make the jump like we did to give up everything else and make your business your only work, you have a lot on the line—and that can take its toll.
I’ll be honest. It paralyzes me with anxiety and fear sometimes. Some days are so close to the negatives on bank accounts that I’m sick to my stomach and don’t want to get out of bed. While this probably seems totally contrary to what I should do (get up and work harder), anyone who has anxiety probably understands what it’s like and what I mean. If you don’t, I’m glad that you don’t deal with these things. But sometimes wondering if you’ll have the money to make your mortgage or rent or even buy groceries is enough to drive you momentarily insane. You get lost in the ledgers and the spreadsheets and the moving money around and your heart feels like it’s just going to burst out of your chest as you hit “pay minimum payment” on your credit card bill.
Yes, it’s scary at times. But, then I look at what I get to do. I get to meet new creative people nearly every day. I get to watch peoples’ hearts open as they learn something about themselves—that they can create. We’ve built a tribe of “our kind of people”. Who doesn’t want that in their life, after all? I’m surrounded by treasures of the earth and the artist all day long. I have friends across the country and across the world that I know have our backs. And, now, my ideas are mine to implement—for better or worse. I don’t need to run my ideas by a manager and hope they don’t take the credit. I get to play and try and experiment. And none of this would be possible if we hadn’t taken that first plunge.
And, if that was it, that would still be enough to deal with the anxiety that comes along with it all. But that’s not all. We’ve also watched so many people who started making jewelry with us go on to build their own businesses. Sometimes it’s just selling a few pieces here and there as they feel they want to. But, other times, it’s full-fledged businesses with tax IDs and fictitious names. We’ve helped these people fill out forms, get credit card processing, and make websites. We’ve had the privilege of helping people of all ages start their own businesses. And that’s really the amazing part. Not only have we built a creative community, but we’ve build our own small business community.
I guess as Small Business Saturday is approaching, I’ve had a lot on my mind about what it is to own your own business. People often ask what it’s like, and it’s always hard to put into a few sentences (obviously…look at this post already!). It all comes down to our supporters though. Without all the wonderful people who shop with us and visit us and take classes with us, we couldn’t be here. We couldn’t pay our mortgage, and we couldn’t develop new and interesting ideas, groups, and programs to allow people to explore their creativity. And, over the years, if we hadn’t been around doing what we’re doing, many other people may not have started their own businesses or realized their talents. You never know what’s going to happen when you start your own business. You never know how many lives you’re going to touch. And, you certainly don’t know where the path will lead.
Today, I’m doing what I dreamed of doing when I was that young boy with the support of a lovely family and community. And, I’m helping others achieve that dream, too. I’d say that’s a pretty great path to be on.
Comments
Post a Comment